Friday, June 26, 2015

The Bouncy Seat

Hey readers! Do you remember this post about the types of seats you encounter on the commute? I wrote about a train seat that felt similar to those warm, sticky soft toilet seats of the 1970s. Somehow, they've lost their support structure, resulting in a dropped out center. How does a seat get like this? Who knows. But it happens frequently on the Long Island Rail Road.

Today, I boarded my evening train about ten minutes early. The car was about 25% full, and I had my pick of seats. I swiftly hunted for just the right aisle seat and came upon one that clearly had a dropped center. The aisle seat directly behind it was not occupied, so I sat there. I took out my computer to do some work, but I put it aside so I could tell you this story about... the bouncy seat.

Exhibit A: I'm in red, bouncy seat in front of me
The bouncy seat? No, this isn't about a seat you put a baby in.

See Exhibit A. I'm the guy in the red, and the dropped center seat is noted by the 1970s era soft toilet seat. It's in front of me.

As we got closer to departure time, more people boarded and filled the seats. There weren't many aisle seats left, and people began eyeing the seat in front of me.

This is where the entertainment begins.

Exhibit B: Each person attempted to sit, but gave up quickly
A man walked over and sat down. As quickly as he landed in the seat, BANG! he bounced back up and looked for other seating arrangements. The seat appeared spring-loaded. Exhibit B shows the three-step process, which occurred over the course of two seconds.

One person after another sat in the bouncy seat, only to immediately stand back up and look for alternate arrangements. Finally, as we flew through the tunnel, a man walked over to the seat and sat. Like all the others, he stood back up but there was nowhere for him to go in the crowded train. He looked around, but reluctantly sat back down for the duration of the commute.

40 minutes later, we reached my station and I stood, along with many others to exit. Curiously, the man stayed put. Perhaps he had too much numbness in his legs, which happens when you sit on a soft toilet seat for too long.

Happy and safe commuting, and may you encounter uncommon sense.
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  1. I am more concerned that you're frequently riding with Heisenberg and you've clearly lost your hair.

  2. Does Heisenberg live in your town? Is there a pizza on his roof?